As a single mom stepping out into the dating world is terrifying. I would rather face a 6 year old angry over a piece of chocolate cake any day. I always feel like I’m doing something wrong, or like I don’t fit in. When I go places I always see this young Barbie looking girls with bright blonde hair and mini skirts every man in the room single or not turns to look. It almost makes me want to dive behind a bush and pray it’s over. I mean hello before I go out with a guy I always tell them I have a kid so I mean right up front I’m pretty much shouting I’m not a Barbie doll and most likely will never look like one again. Now I’m not saying I’m ugly. Actually, I think I look pretty good for already having a child, now I’m not over self-confident either.
Why does the dating world have to be so hard for single moms? I wish there was this magical dating pool single moms could go to and find a decent man. This is the first time I have been single in almost 8 years so I’m way out there when it comes to starting over. I would really rather stay home with my daughter in PJ’s and watch Cinderella re-runs. Yet I don’t want to be the crazy cat lady either. I just wish it wasn’t this hard that it makes me want to give up.
I know I can’t be the only person parent or not that has this problem. Then I go somewhere and I see all the girls I went to school with happily married or happily dating some great guy. Where do they find these men? I asked a close friend of mine the other day this question and she didn’t have any answer. So my next question is this. Is there a catalog we can order these great guys from? If so will someone send me one? I don’t want to be alone for the rest of my life, but I’m not going to settle for someone that I don’t want around my daughter.
I shouldn’t go out on a date and have to watch my date find interest in a living Barbie doll. When we go out their interest should be in me! Dating these days is like hunting in a wild jungle. The barbie doll girls are lioness and they are very aggressive. Hunting around something like you need to be very armed.
So I guess until I discover this secret garden that these men hide in I will remain alone. Dating for me sucks. It’s bad enough that I’m nervous about it and feel like I’m completly out of place. Then when the date is over I find I have nothing in common with the man and feel like banging my head on the wall. Sheww is it worth it? A question I ask myself all the time.
You wouldn’t believe how many men I run into that doesn’t have a job? Ok I know the economy is sucky, but how can you take a girl out on a date with no money? Give it up man. This one date I went on I have to talk about was the worst date of history. I actually ran in the house when he dropped me off so that I could get away from him. He asked me out to dinner. I was interested in him so I accepted. Then when dinner was over he expected me to pay! Ok here is my theory. If you ask the person out then you are obligated to pay. I didn’t ask him out so why do I have to pay? I figure he done that to me I was running for the hills. If I had to pay everytime he wanted to go somewhere I could do that with my daughter. Plus she was better company.
So home I will be until I find where these men are hiding. Come out come out where ever you are. Ha ha. I’m so done with these losers I keep finding. If I have another sucky date I’ll report here at Project Save Mom. Because this momma really needs saving.
The most important thing we consentrate on when we send our children to school is their grades. We are always worried about how much they will learn and will they be prepared for the real world. When they come home from school the first question we ask is “what did you do in school today?” One thing most of us don’t concentrate on is their social life. Most parents, including me, send our children to school to learn not socialize. I always was worried about her education it wasn’t until recently that I began to focus on her socialization ability.
Most small children, ecspecially kindergarteners, have a problem socializing. They don’t really know how to make a friend with a child they have never met. Most don’t know what to talk about. Others are very shy. Being social to a child can be a very scary thing. If this problem isn’t noticed before long the child starts to wonder why nobody likes them. They don’t understand that others don’t dislike them, they just aren’t sure about them. Any child that has difficulty socializing will not make friends easy. Being unsure about themselves makes other child uneasy. Self-confidence plays a big factor here. If a child has high selfesteem then other children will flock around them.
Getting children involved is the best way for them to make friends easier. It doesn’t have to just be a sport, although sports are a great way for children to stay physically fit. If the child isn’t sport inclined, like my kiddo, then there are other activities they may help out. Maybe girl scouts or boy scouts. This group can help with social skills and life skills. Also they have great fundraisers. I mean who doesn’t like the cookies they sell? Academic teams are a great group. If your child has more book smarts than social skills then this may be what they need. They will be able to test their academic ability and meet others who are just the same.
Different schools have different groups. Some schools have many groups and activities to choose from while others don’t. If your school doens’t have that many then get invovled and see if you can persuade your school to develop some. Who knows maybe they will appoint you over a group.
Social skills are imporant to our kiddos. I’m not saying they have to be the most popular, but no one wants to be alone all the time. Even if your child doesn’t say anything about it deep down the think about it. If your child won’t talk to you about what’s going on then go to another source. Talk to their teachers, make unscheduled appointments through out the school days to see with your owns eyes. It’s not strange to do that there is no wrong reason to be an over concerned parent.
Facebook, may take up most of our time, but occasionally it shows us insight into momma-hood. As I was checking out my newsfeed today I noticed a very funny picture that served a point. As a read the story my jaw dropped and an imaginary horror film rolled inside my head. I don’t know if any of you all saw it, but if not you should have if I can find it I will try to post it to my facebook page for all too see. By the way you can find me on facebook under Project Save Mom as a group. It’s still a work in progress, as a mom I have limited amounts of time.
But about the pic. It was a dad wearing daisy duke shorts with writing on his jacket that said “Ask my girls if they think short shorts are sooo cute!” Not only was this dad sporting the famous shorts, but he was sporting them in wal-mart while holding his daughters hand. Kuddos dad! I’m in agreement that our young kids are too much into the short shorts fad. As I looked at this picture my own movie in my head of my daughter as a teen. Almost like a glimpse into the future. Is this dad doing what I wish I had the guts to do to my daughter in the future?
I am not all for the short shorts and I don’t wear them. They may be more appropriate for an adult, but our children and teens should not be sporting them. At least that is my opinion. They can cause the wrong kind of attention and that is what our children need to be aware of. Children and teens don’t understand there are sick people in this world so they may be capturing the attention of more than just boys their age. As parents it’s our job to bring this to their attention. I for one don’t want to have to watch my daughter try to sneak out the door in those cut-offs and then have to worry about some freak out there trying to persuade her to get in his car. It’s gross to see a young teen wearing these and then notice the shady 45 year old man in the corner “checking it her out.”
Sometimes I wander, where are their parents? We are their moms and dads not their friends. So we shouldn’t feel bad for telling them “Hey your cheeks are playing peek-a-boo!” So like I said go dad who sported those shorts you got the right thinking.
As I was surfing the web I found this site that had some interesting things they say us women are not supposed to say to our husbands. Now I’m not to sure about some of them, but I guess it’s because I’m not a man. So any men that want to give us women a perspective on it please leave a comment we would love to know if you agree with these things, or if you would like to add a few. I know as I was reading this I noticed that I myself have done a few of these so-called No No’s! So I’m going to list them on here and if you would like to check out the source of the sight for more info they address to it is listed on the Favs page and at the bottom of this post. Have fun see if any of you women can check off a few that you have said or done.
Things You Are Not Supposed To Say To Your Husband
#1.) “You’re just like your father!”
#2.) “When are you going to find a job?” ( I have done this one a few times myself.)
#3.) “My mother warned me you’d do this!”
#4.) “Just leave it. I’ll do it myself!” (Ok I have to admit I have done this more than a few times.)
#5.) “You always (BLANK)” or “You never (BLANK)”
#6.) “Do you really think those pants are flattering?” (I’ve not really said it like that, but I have said something like are you really going out of this house dressed that way.)
#7.) “Ugh, we’re hanging out with him again?”
#8.) “Please watch the kids, but don’t do this, take them here, or forget that..” ( I know I have done this one more than a couple and more than a few times. One time I left my kid with her dad I actually left him a list of do’s and dont’s. I was so paranoid over what I have no clue.)
*** So ladies what do you think? Are you guilty of saying these no no’s? Men does it really bother you when we say these things? Come on gives us some feedback here everyone it’s a safe zone and we are interested to know.
** Just want to say that all these sayings that were listed were from the site below. The site below is the owner and creator of what was discussed here. I just want to give them credit for what I borrowed. Thanks.***